It's a conversation
just not any old conversation
How can 'just' talking work?
It works by asking the right first question & then building on that most important answer to build a picture of your best hopes.
See it to reach it.
I'm a bit nervous, what sort of things do you ask?
Surprisingly simple stuff!
Stuff you probably haven't been asked before!
The biggie is where you want to be. Nail that in some detail to keep going.
What difference would that make?
What might you notice then?
Who would be the first to notice?
How would you know they'd noticed?
What would they notice?
What difference would things being better make to them?
On a scale out of 10 (10 the top!) how far along the scale are you today?
How good would be good enough?
If you'd moved slightly up the scale next time, what might you be noticing different?
What else? (the best question - after the first one!)
Will it really make a difference?
Something about visualising & describing what you really want (what you really really really want!) out loud makes it possible.
Describing how others notice & what changes as a result build a concrete picture that becomes real.
Describing in detail what the smallest progress looks like shows it's not just in reach, it's right beside us. And what's right beside us feels much more achievable.
Don't take my word for it!
I use this approach on it's own, as part of a medical assessment & in crises of all sorts. I can see the person in front of me sit up, engage, look relaxed and often smile. I can see often a lightbulb moment where it all becomes real & possible.
I love this approach for all of these reasons.I wish it was more widespread in the medical community - it makes us happier too.